SMOKIN' IN THE BOYS ROOM!!

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 "The Good Review"

Contributed by: Rufino Aviles  The boys’ room outside the cafeteria was nicotine haven. It seems that everyone that went in there had a cigarette after taking care of business. For some, having a cigarette was the main business. The room was always filled with smoke and the smell of cigarettes overpowered everything else. Every so often you could detect the smell of the “funny” cigarettes or, as they were so affectionately referred to, joints. Whenever I had to use that boys’ room, I’d first fill my lungs with air, then hold it, rush in and do my business as quickly as possible (and I think we all know that we can’t hurry these things along that much) and then leave right away. Now, I used to be a smoker, but that was way too much smoke to breathe!

I remember once, while I was trying to do my Flash routine and hurry up, the Cop who used to patrol Brandeis came in. Some of you may remember him – red haired, freckles and built like the Incredible Hulk. We used to lovingly call him RED, and nobody messed with him. The room was of course filled with smoke and when he walked in, he yelled for everybody to get out, which everybody immediately complied with. (Moses probably could have used him when he was trying to get the children of Israel out of Egypt.) He looked around to see if everybody left, then he spotted me, dutifully doing my business at the urinal. He gave me a mean stare and, confronted with this challenge to my manhood, I had no choice…but to sheepishly look away. He was one dude I did not want to mess with. Even though I was taller than he, he looked twice as strong as I did, and besides that, he had a gun on his side. Additionally, I was sort of in a vulnerable position, no way ready to confront anyone. He didn’t say anything to me as he turned and left. I couldn’t hold my breath any longer and had to inhale the toxic air. I don’t think I ever went back in to that restroom again. Ahhh, those were the days!

Motley Crue - Smokin' In The Boys Room 

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